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Scarecrow romanization/translation thread
https://forum.pirouzu.net/viewtopic.php?f=10&t=3056
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Author:  Marekenshin [ Wed Apr 04, 2007 4:41 pm ]
Post subject:  Scarecrow romanization/translation thread

Okay, so here's a repost of the first track:

yume no mukou made
boku wa tabi wo tsutzukeru tsumori da yo
KIMI wo tsurete
dareka ga katatta
genjitsu to iu na no monogatari ga
kotae ja nai ze

mieru darou yubisashite yo
kasuka na akari ga
hakanakutemo maboroshi demo
mieru darou

kureyuku sora karakau kaze
futari no te wa tsumetai kedo
hanasanai de aruiteitai
chikai mo naku shinjiaeta
I want call you,
'Scarecrow'

itsuwari ni kemuru machi no zawameki ni
oiyararete ki ga meiru kedo
taka ga sentsubu no namida ga koborereba
sumu koto sa tada sore dake sa

kikoeru darou unazuite yo
fusawashii ongaku ga
chiisakutemo kiesou demo
kikoeru darou

matataku hoshi mishiranu yami
hanbun dake tsuki ga warau
sabishikunai kanashikunai
boku no tame ni KIMI ga warau
I want call you,
'Scarecrow'

kureyuku sora karakau kaze
futari no te wa tsumetai kedo
hanasanai de aruiteitai
kamisama yori KIMI wo shinjiru
mou sugu darou me no mae darou
hitori ja nai hitori ja nai
matataku hoshi mishiranu yami
hanbun dake tsuki ga warau
You can call me,
'Scarecrow'

yume no mukou made
boku wa tabi wo tsutzukeru tsumori da yo
KIMI wo tsurete

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Until the other side of the dream,
I plan to continue the journey,
and bring you along.
Someone said,
the story called reality
is not the answer.

You can probably see it,
the dim light I'm pointing at.
It may be fleeting, it may be an illusion,
but you can probably see it.

The darkening sky, the teasing wind,
our hands are cold, but
don't let go, I want to walk.
It's no promise, but I believed.
I want call you,
'Scarecrow'

In the bustle of the falsely hazy town,
I am driven away. I feel depressed, but
it's only if a thousand tears were to fall
that it would be the end. Only then.

You can probably hear it, with a nod,
the appropriate music.
It may be small, it may seem to be about to disappear,
but you can probably hear it.

This twinkling star, this strange darkness;
though only halfway, the moon smiles.
I'm not lonely, I'm not sad;
for my sake, you smile.
I want call you,
'Scarecrow'

The darkening sky, the teasing wind,
our hands are cold, but
don't let go, I want to walk.
More than in God, I believe in you.
Probably very soon, probably right in front of my eyes,
I'm not alone; I'm not alone.
This twinkling star, this strange darkness;
though only halfway, the moon smiles.
You can call me,
'Scarecrow'

Until the other side of the dream,
I plan to continue the journey,
and bring you along.

----------------------------------------------------------

There we have it. There's some awkward phrasing in "appropriate music" and "I want to walk" that I will probably take a look at later.

awesomely enough, the lyrics I posted from what I heard off the PV were perfect 8) except that I should have stuck with the "I want call you" that I first had when we only had that short clip...

Author:  Marekenshin [ Wed Apr 04, 2007 4:44 pm ]
Post subject: 

02 - BOYS BE LOCKSMITH

kimi ga kokoro wo tozashita no wa
doko no dare no sei
akai tsuki ni miorosarete
kon'ya mo fukigen kai

massugu ryoume de yume wo mitara
mabushisugite itai kedo

TSUBAME wa sora ni kujira wa umi ni fusawashiku
hachi wa hana to koi shiteru darou
hito wa hito to deatte jibun to mukiatte
boku wa KIMI ni koi shiteru no sa
kitzuite kure

furue ga tomaranai no wa
kabe wo koetai kara
namida ga afuredashita no wa
honki no shouko sa

daremo ga heiki na kao shitetemo
mane suru koto wa nai nda yo

ubawareteku katachi no nai kirameki ni
mada oosawagi shiteitai no sa
natsukashii omoide ja nai
ima no ADOBENCHAA
KIMI wo sasotteiru nda yo
wakatte kure

massugu ryoume de yume wo mitara
mabushisugite itai kedo

TSUBAME wa sora ni kujira wa umi ni fusawashiku
hachi wa hana to koi shiteru darou
hito wa hito to deatte jubin to mukiatte
boku wa KIMI ni fasawashii kamo
tameshite kure

kimi ga kokoro wo tozashita no wa
doko no dare no sei
akai tsuki ni miorosarete
kon'ya mo fukigen kai

------------------------------------

i'll probably translate sometime this week.

Author:  kuru [ Thu Apr 05, 2007 2:15 am ]
Post subject: 

[quote]kimi ga kokoro wo tozashita no wa
doko no dare no sei
akai tsuki ni miorosarete
kon'ya mo [b]fukegen [/b]kai[/quote]

edit it. :wink:

Author:  Marekenshin [ Thu Apr 05, 2007 2:16 am ]
Post subject: 

Hahaha typowned. :oops:

Author:  Joyeuse [ Thu Apr 05, 2007 2:23 am ]
Post subject: 

Just an offhand remark, but I'd say that since "mukou" can also mean "beyond," that first part might be more elegantly (and loosely) translated as something like "I plan to continue my journey beyond the dream, and bring you with me."

"Beyond" also seems like a more appropriate word, considering the next lines are about a "story called reality" i.e., a world outside the dream.

Author:  Marekenshin [ Thu Apr 05, 2007 2:28 am ]
Post subject: 

"the other side" and "beyond" are the same thing, practically.

actually, "the other side" suggest more of a barrier between the dream and the "story called reality," in my opinion. I don't see how "I plan to continue my journey beyond the dream" is more elegant than "Until the far side of the dream, I plan to continue the journey." When the feel of the song is poetic, I prefer to phrase it more poetically.

Author:  Joyeuse [ Thu Apr 05, 2007 2:32 am ]
Post subject: 

Beyond means, well, beyond. Past, farther than, in this case, to leave the dream. Saying "Beyond the dream" and "To the other side of the dream" don't mean the same thing. Beyond will carry the connotation of breaking out of it, or in my opinion, heading to parts unknown. To the other side implies still being within the dream, just on...well, the other side, like it says.

Make sense?

Author:  Marekenshin [ Thu Apr 05, 2007 2:36 am ]
Post subject: 

I guess I see what you're saying now. But "the other side" of the river doesn't imply being in the river. It all depends on how uptight you want to get about the syntax there. You understood what I was saying, and that's what matters the most.

Author:  Moon_Margaret [ Thu Apr 05, 2007 3:57 am ]
Post subject: 

02 - BOYS BE LOCKSMITH

whose fault is it
that you closed your heart
looked down upon by the red moon
in a bad mood tonight too?

if you look straight at a dream with both eyes
it's bright and it hurts

the swallow for the sky, the whale for the sea are worthy
the bee is probably in love with the flower
people meet people and look at themselves
I'm in love with you
please realize that

the shivering doesn't stop
because I want to go over the wall
the fact that tears started to overflow
is proof that I'm serious

even if everyone has a straight face
you don't have to mimic them

for the formless sparkle that is being lost
I still want to panic
it's not a nostalgic memory
now's adventure
you're tempting me
please understand

if you look straight at a dream with both eyes
it's bright and it hurts

the swallow for the sky, the whale for the sea are worthy
the bee is probably in love with the flower
people meet people and look at themselves
maybe I for you am worthy
please try me

whose fault is it
that you closed your heart
looked down upon by the red moon
in a bad mood tonight too?

Author:  Moon_Margaret [ Thu Apr 05, 2007 4:00 am ]
Post subject: 

Also I agree with the beyond thing.. Beyond is a better translation in this situation...

Author:  Marekenshin [ Thu Apr 05, 2007 4:07 am ]
Post subject: 

[quote="Moon_Margaret"]looked down upon by the red moon
in a bad mood tonight too?[/quote]
I'd say maybe "looked down upon by the red moon,
are you in a bad mood tonight too?"

[quote]if you look straight at a dream with both eyes
it's bright and it hurts[/quote]
maybe "though it's so bright that it hurts"
you left out both the "-sugite" and the "kedo" here. :/

[quote]the swallow for the sky, the whale for the sea are worthy[/quote]
I thought "fusawashii" was more of a "right for" than "worthy,"
like "the swallows are meant for the sky and the wales for the sea" or something.

[quote]it's not a nostalgic memory
now's adventure [/quote]
"now's adventure" is a little awkward, but it's late and I'm not thinking of anything better right now.

[quote]the swallow for the sky, the whale for the sea are worthy
maybe I for you am worthy
please try me[/quote]
Again, maybe "right for" instead of "worthy."

Other than that, all I can say is "darn, you beat me to it." XD

Author:  Blank [ Thu Apr 05, 2007 6:35 am ]
Post subject: 

Yeah, he's said he's fluent in Nipponjese.


You've got competition, Mare. :wink:

Author:  Marekenshin [ Thu Apr 05, 2007 10:38 am ]
Post subject: 

No offense blank, but that may be one of the dumbest posts you've made in a long time. For one, "Nipponjese"? :roll:

For two, I romanize and translate lyrics for the fun of it and to practice Japanese, and it doesn't matter whether somebody else has already done it.

Author:  Moon_Margaret [ Thu Apr 05, 2007 11:25 am ]
Post subject: 

Hah. Well excuse me mare, I didn't feel like spending more than 4 minutes on it.. >_>

Who cares whether it sounds good or not in english? Japanese translated into english never sounds good anyway. And if you would rather remain the only one to translate all the lyrics etc, be my guest, I was merely trying to help. I'm sure it's a hell of a lot easier to me than it is to you...

And "fusawashii" is definitely worthy. Right for has a different nuance completely.

Author:  Marekenshin [ Thu Apr 05, 2007 1:38 pm ]
Post subject: 

I don't care who translates what, but all I was doing was posting some comments to try and see if there was better ways to phrase things and whether or not I was misunderstanding some of the phrases.

Also, I think the point of translating something into English is to get the meaning across as best you can. Sure you can do a quick job that gets the gist across, but no need to get upset if it's just a quick job and somebody mentions that some things got left out of it. Most of my comments were, as I said, to also try to see if I am understanding the Japanese correctly anyway, so it's not like you should get all upset about it.

Japanese translated into English can sound as good as any language translated into any language, you just have to work with it like you would anything else. :?

Every definition I've seen of "fusawashii" is things along the lines of "appropriate" as opposed to "worthy," and in English it doesn't make sense to say "the whale is worthy of the sea," but rather "the whale belongs in the sea" or some such thing. :dizzy:

edit: also, "kimi wo sasotteiru" is "i'm calling out to you" rather than "you're tempting me," isn't it? :?

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