Every night for a week, I've dreamt that you were really with me.
A smile was plastered on my entire face
As if I were an acrobat mounting a bicycle in the circus.

I don't understand your teasing of my impatient self.
You cloak yourself in defenselessness
So I think I'm close enough to reach you.

I want to hide with you in an orange film garden.
I want to return to that serial story.

Every night for three weeks, I've dreamt that you were really with me.
You're making my heart churn.
You've left the faucet of my feelings running.
I feel like a naughty pet dog you're training.
You're manipulating my eager self.
You don't even walk me properly.
Your mask of innocence is just a deliberately deceptive trap.

I want to go play again in that orange film garden.
Escape reality to glory.
Ucrowned late show.

(repeat without verses 1 and 4)

Every night for ten years, I've dreamt that you were really with me.

[quote="terra"]
i have comments on this part, but first, what did you make of the からがって? i would say i made a typo and it should be karakatte but he says karagatte in the song. -_-
[/quote]
If the everything else he wrote didn't sound like he'd been to a good university, I'd have asked a native speaker if "karagatte" was a valid dialect mispronuncation for "karakatte"

aseru boku wo kara ga tte umaku hanasenai
There are two functional verbs, (since umaku is acting like an adverb, and aseru is acting like an adjective), "tte" and "umaku hanasenai".
"tte" has an object of "aseru boku", i.e. what is said is that he is impatient.
"umaku hanasenai" has a subject of "kara", i.e. what is not understood is why this is said.

[quote="terra"]
i would stick with the phrasing you started with in the first stanza for consistency (Every night for a week, I dream that you are really with me).
[/quote]
"リアルにそばにいる" is omitted the second time, but "現れて" is not, you're still right, given the Japanese tendency to drop the end of repeated phrases and still mean the whole phrase.

[quote="terra"]
anyway, "the third week" is not the same as "for three weeks"
[/quote]
Unfortunately, I'm not particuarly strong on time duration particles (or the meaning of a lack of them in this case). I really ought to read that section of the grammar book again, now that I've seen them enough times for it it stick.

[quote="terra"]
and you left out 'mukan'. (i wonder if i put the wrong kanji there... i'll check.)
[/quote]
"Untitled" fits so perfectly that I don't think I'll believe "uncrowned" even if it's in the notes.

You can really learn a lot about Japanese word order from this song.

well, my hearing is mistaken, because it says 'karakatte' in the booklet. sorry about that.

"You tease me for my impatience, and I can barely get the words out of my mouth
You pretend you're defenseless so it seems like I can reach you"

(yoso'ou has multiple meanings)

see if that makes more sense. if not, i'd be happy to explain it. (i just think it's more useful to let you puzzle it out a little )

[quote]
"リアルにそばにいる" is omitted the second time, but "現れて" is not, you're still right, given the Japanese tendency to drop the end of repeated phrases and still mean the whole phrase.
[/quote]

i just meant the first part should be consistent. so it'd be like 'every night for three weeks i dreamed of you'.

[quote]I feel like a naughty pet dog you're training.
You're manipulating my enthusuiastic happiness.
You don't even walk me properly.
[/quote]

'training' was not a verb in that phrase. 'I feel like a naughty pet dog' is sufficient.

'enthusiastic happiness' is a lot for 'hashagu'... i think just 'enthusiasm' would be okay.

and on that last part, it is definitely 無冠. -_- i don't have any good suggestions there at the moment.

[quote]I want to escape reality to the glory of that unnamed late show.[/quote]

to take the phrases literally:

reality escape glory
uncrowned late show

so i think it's something more like 'the glory of escaping reality in/to the uncrowned late show'.

Ok, final edit.

Lyrics to "Orange Film Garden" by the Pillows, translated by ShyElf.

Every night for a week, you've really appeared in front of me in a dream.
A smile was plastered on my entire face
As if I were an acrobat riding a bicycle in the circus.

I don't understand your teasing of my impatience.
You cloak yourself in defenselessness
So that I think I'm close enough to reach you.

I want to hide with you in an orange film garden.
Even reruns of that serial story are good.

Every night for three weeks, you've appeared in front of me in a dream.
You're making my heart churn.
You've left the faucet of my feelings running.
I feel like a naughty pet dog you're training.
You're manipulating my eager self.
You don't even walk me properly.
Your mask of innocence is just a deliberately deceptive trap.

I want to go play again in that orange film garden.
I want to escape reality to the glory of that popular late show.

(repeat without verses 1 and 4)

Every night for ten years, you've really appeared in front of me in a dream.


After reading a couple pages of kanji replies from some people in Japan trying to help me understand this, the "Uncrowned" word apparently normally means something popular, and considered deserving of an award but to which one has not yet been given. I consider this a fairly serious failure of the edict. I also missed the "rerun" 3-kanji combination, and your suggestions were helpful for pointing out what needed to be improved.